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Monday night is sandwich night.

Perfectly arranged fruit and impeccably stacked vegetables. Whole Foods – the Mecca for all things organic and good for you. There, amongst the bins and boxes of fresh roots and herbs, I find myself yearning for a Diet Coke-free existence. A life of herbal teas, homeopathic remedies, and alternative protein sources. Ah… can you smell it? The air of health and endless dinner possibilities!

I shop there at least twice a week. You see, my husband and three small children all have gluten and dairy intolerances of varying degrees. These allergies are among the most expensive and inconvenient… next to soy and egg (I don’t know how those people do it). It’s hard. Really hard. In fact, at times, it down right sucks. My children are denied pizza and cake at birthday parties. My husband, who travels frequently, is at the mercy of room service and airport cooks who have never even heard of gluten. I pack lunches, frantically sort through Halloween candy, and attempt having my family “fit in” at parties and special events as much as possible.

Home, however, is a safe place. My kitchen is a gluten/dairy-free zone, and I am one bad-ass gluten-free mamma jamma! Enter Whole Foods.

Once I introduced myself to Mecca, I quickly realized these allergies might be the best thing to ever happen to us. Prior to being diagnosed, the kids and I were on a downward spiral of buttered noodles and jelly toast. I believe they call it “the white diet” – rice, pasta, bread, fries, cereal, etc. Filling, yet nutritionally deficient, foods. Something had to change. I knew it and my husband knew it. However, once he was diagnosed, it was as if someone had made the decision for us. It was time to shop elsewhere.

Do you recall the scene from Wizard of Oz when the movie switches from black and white to color? Well, walking into Whole Foods for the first time was kind of like that. It was beautiful. Artistically lit apple displays, every variety of lentil and bean, antibiotic-free meats and poultry, and, most importantly, the promise of children who would gladly eat their organic steamed vegetables and ask for seconds.

When I walked in, my demeanor immediately changed, as though I needed to pay homage to the produce Gods by speaking in a soft voice and walking slowly. It was like church. I was deliberate with my approach. Carefully planning meals in my mind… grilled ginger and gluten-free soy marinated chicken breast, red potatoes with fresh dill, fresh roasted corn and tomato salad, steamed broccoli florets. We were going to be the healthiest family on the planet and this wonderful place was going to help us get there.

Well, did you know certain bakeries have REALLY improved the taste and texture of gluten-free bread? And, the rice pasta ain’t half-bad, either. There’s gluten-free/dairy-free pizza crust, cookies, brownies, cakes, pancake mixes, and incredibly delicious dairy-free ice cream, too.

Yesterday was Monday. My son attends religious education after school on Mondays. We had sandwiches for dinner.

How do you like them organic pink lady apples??

Photo by rkazda taken from www.flickr.com.

Facebook: A Public Service Announcement

Oh, Facebook.  You’ve become a defining icon of my generation.  You’ve completely changed how people interact, fight, plan parties, and even talk.  You’ve made a billionaire out of a guy who is younger than I am (SIGH).  You know what else you’ve done?

You managed to irritate me on a daily basis.

You failed to provide the rules .  Yeah, I said it.  You need rules because your eight million plus friends have gotten out of control.  The  situation is so ridiculous that, a few weeks ago, I actually deactivated my Facebook account (GASP! No fear; I had to reactivate it to announce to the world that I got engaged. DUH.)   Since you have refused to implement guidelines, I will do it for you because I am a gracious, yet annoyed,  user.

When posting a profile picture, try to keep it classy or funny.  This isn’t Myspace.  The whole “I’m going to take a picture from a really high angle so I look awesome, and everyone will awe at my huge boobs” picture pose went out of style circa 2005 and will have the same historical effect as Olan Mills studio pictures from the 80s.  Having a profile picture in this pose will open you up to ridicule, and if you’re friends with me, a hearty defriending.

Everyone loves, LOVES their significant other but announcing it nine million times a day with back-and-forth Facebook posts and gag-inducing statuses makes everyone wretch.  Also, terms of affection like “wifey” and “boo” make me want to reach through the computer and slap you.  Since I cannot do that, my irritation is taken out on co-workers and my significant other, making them sad and scared.  You don’t want to incite fear and sadness, do you?  No?  Then stop using these terms immediately.

People have become accustomed to announcing their entire lives on Facebook.   Most of us are friends with everyone we’ve ever met on Facebook.  Frankly, I’m pretty sure you don’t want that co-worker of your friend from high school that you met while drunk that you’re on your period and your cramps are horrible.

Similarly, if something really horrible happened to someone and that person isn’t sharing it on Facebook, it is probably not appropriate to post your condolences on their wall.  Send them a card.  If you aren’t friends in real life, SEND THEM A MESSAGE.  Some people don’t want the Facebook world to know about all the super terrible things in their life.

If you have an overly cryptic Facebook status, people  realize that you are just looking for attention.  Things like, “super scared,” “I can’t believe what just happened,” or “So happy” scream that you want people to ask you about it.  If you are that hard up for attention (we all are, it’s okay), just announce it.  Further, being cryptic in an attempt to not overshare is oxymoronic, as clearly you are looking for the opportunity to over share.

Not everyone takes flattering pictures.  Do not post unflattering pictures of your friends.  If you must post them, do not then tag your friends in those pictures.  They will hate you.

I get that we’re all worked up about politics, but if you’re going to say something ignorant about one of the parties, make sure that your grammar and spelling is correct.  You don’t want to lose all credibility, do you?  In fact, maybe just use correct spelling and grammar in every post.  All. The. Time.

There are, of course, several other rules, but we’ll save those for another time.  However, if we all start abiding by these very simple and reasonable rules, I think we can make Facebook an enjoyable corner of the internet for everyone.

You can find more snark from the Faux Trixie on her personal site: The Faux Trixie

Space: The final frontier?

I remember so much about visiting my grandma and grandpa’s old house. Watching the Austrian cuckoo clock, playing with the Lithuanian dolls they kept in their basement, and laying on the floor gnawing stale candy while listening to The Sound of Music soundtrack crackle and pop on the record player. I especially loved exploring their bedroom.

It was a rich place filled with every treasure a seven year old could ask for.  A closet full of grandpa’s hats and bow ties, a bathroom stocked with potent perfume samples, and a jewelry chest loaded with clip-on earrings and beaded necklaces. I would come out of there looking and smelling like a cheap hooker if left unsupervised for too long. It was paradise. There was just something I never quite understood about that room – something that still haunts my memory to this very day. They kept separate beds. Two perfectly identical twin beds with white tasseled quilts.

Now, even I, at the ripe old age of seven, knew mommies and daddies needed to sleep together in a big bed so they could kiss and snuggle all night long… right? I mean, they were MARRIED! How could they not want to sleep together?? Totally weird and beyond my comprehension at the time but, oh well, at least I still had free reign of their closet. Whatever.

Fast forward 3o years. I am happily married to the love of my life and wondering if good ole gram and gramps were onto something. Heck… scrap the twin bed thing. I might actually shoot for separate rooms!

I love my husband. I REALLY do. I remember the days when we couldn’t possibly sleep any closer. At one point, we shared a twin bed for about 6 months. I thought, “We are SOOO awesome together. I don’t know ANY other couple who could live like this!”

Well, things have changed. Now, when it comes to bedtime, I like it early, I like it quiet, and I like it R O O M Y.

Strike one? Homeboy comes to bed late. Strike two? He has this bedtime ritual of blowing his nose, clearing his throat, and gulping loudly from a water bottle – glug, glug, glug – all at the bedside. Okay. Now I’m awake. Then comes strike three – the clicking of his Blackberry keyboard as he sets his alarm. The icing on the cake is a few deep sighs, some pulling of the sheets, and perhaps an attempt to “snuggle”.

Poor thing. He KNOWS, unless he is getting one of mommy’s “special hugs”, he is fully required to stay on his side of the bed with his hands and feet to himself. Not so much as a cold toe is allowed to linger over to my side of the bed.

He really does take one for the team.

I’m sure many of you are thinking, “What a cold, horrible witch!” Really? Am I? I kiss, console, and hug my three kids all day long – tons of love and affection happening here. It’s just that, if someone decides watching Army of Darkness on cable is more important that coming to bed, then all I ask for is a peaceful night. And, trust me… you ain’t seen“horrible witch” until I’ve come off a bad night’s sleep. I would probably being doing the world, especially my family, complete justice by insisting he or I sleep elsewhere.

However, don’t give up on us yet. This horrible witch still has some fight left in her. Today, I bought myself a pair ear plugs. I’m hoping those, a little red wine, and a downed cable line will do the trick. Wish me luck.

Technology – The unifier

As a man who works in the field of Information Technology, it should come as no surprise that I’m something of a tech head.  I love technology and everything it does, from the alarm clock that wakes me up in the morning, to the television I watch just before bed.  Yet, as I talk to people, I find that technology gets a really bad rap.  Some say it works to divide, cutting us off from our fellow human beings of flesh and blood.  Personally, I don’t find this to be the case at all.  In my experience, it has worked to bring me closer to my friends and family, and has even changed my life for the better.

I was a social outcast for my elementary school career, it wasn’t until high school that I actually acquired a real friend.  In high school I found my place among fellow nerds, and we spent time in our parents’ basements playing video games or DnD.  I thought these were good times, and I still look back upon them fondly, but they weren’t perfect.  Girls were still a mythical creature I’ve only read about, and being in the same room as one instilled a sense of panic.  Luckily, though, technology offered away to speak to them without actually sharing the same air.  AOL had it’s issues, but it was the internet, and the internet was good.

After high school I lost contact with some of my friends, but others I was able to stay in touch with through the magic of the internet.  Amidst the whine of the modem connection there was friendship.  One day a friend of mine was sitting at art school, and he had his notebook open.  A girl sitting next to him noticed my screen name written on the paper, and exclaimed it was a character from her favorite show, coincidentally also mine.  He got her screen name for it and I added it to my list.  I remember staring at it for a long time, here was a flesh and blood girl, sharing my digital space.  I kept clicking and typing a greeting, only to close the window at the last moment.  Finally, I took a deep breath and typed as fast as I could, hitting enter before my better judgment was able to stay my hand.

We talked a lot after that.  We shared photos and music, and grew close.  Occasionally I would travel to Chicago to see her (I lived in Indiana at the time).  My life became hectic, as I dropped out of college and bounced between a few crappy jobs.  But still, the internet was at home, and we still talked.  Finally, I landed a help desk job in the Chicago area, which was conveniently only a half-hour drive from her home.  We began hanging out regularly, and as the seasons passed, she became the wife I know and love today.

Today, technology still plays a role in bringing us closer.  While we have things to talk about, and enjoy each others company, our recreational preferences don’t always synch up.  While she’d rather go out for a walk or a movie, I’m generally happy staying in and relaxing.  I get worn out being dragged about (my job keeps me out and on the road most of the time), and staying home too often upsets her.  Finding a balance can be very difficult.  This problem is overcome when we’re able to play video games together, an activity we both really enjoy.  We can spend hours working together towards a goal, and have a lot of fun.  Without technology, that would be one less experience that we could share together.

Because of this, I could never see technology as divisive, even though I’m sure others hide behind the digital wall.   But if you utilize technology to reach out and connect with people, it can definitely serve to bring us all closer together.

Zel-kun out.

V vs. The Unholy Toddler … I mean, my nephew.

He looks sweet, right?  Last night I watched my nephew, B.  He’s just about 18 months and apparently growing up fast because he’s starting his “Terrible 2′s” early.  Of course, I know nothing about children to begin with and had to ask on Twitter if the “3 Second Rule” applies to babies.  After I picked the chicken nugget out of my hair and dropped it on the floor, I gave it right back to him and he put it in his mouth.  Whatever, a little dirt never hurt anyone.

This probably won’t shock you, but I am not very good with babies or toddlers. After my sister left the house my sweet little adorable nephew turned into Damien from The Omen and I was looking for three 6′s on his newly buzzed head, truly hoping I wouldn’t have to sacrifice him on an alter in a church.  Mainly because I am pretty sure any church I walk into these days would burn to the ground.

He screamed holy hell for about 10 minutes and then he stuck his thumb in his mouth and apparently went to his “happy place” because he was pretty much comatose for the next fifteen minutes.  I got him to eat a bit (hence, the nugget episode) and then when he was done instead of politely telling me he’s done he decided to scream bloody murder again.

I tried everything from holding him (scratch marks to prove it) to promising to buy him and his friends beer when they’re in high school.  Then he started doing something really strange that I kind of forgot he knew how to do.  So imagine how ridiculous I felt when I found out my 18 month old nephew is smarter than me.  The kid is standing there signing to me.  I forgot my sister was teaching him sign language.   Holy crap, I had no idea what he wanted and he wouldn’t stop.

He kept doing the same signs over and over and I thought maybe he wanted more food so I’d strap him to his chair again, which kicked off another round of I-can-make-your-ears-bleed screaming.  I had to put in the DVDs and fast forward until I figured out what he wanted while he’s standing there screaming and signing.  Water.  That’s it.  He just wanted some water. Stupid smart baby.

He also just started giving kisses, which is actually kind of violent.  He doesn’t gently lean in, he kind of falls at you head first.  He fell into my arm but I was happy I got one anyway.  At least he tried.

We went for a little walk before I put him down, which actually went really well and then he was all tired and worn out from giving his Auntie V a migraine.  I changed his diaper (it rarely happens, but I can actually do it and even put it on the right way this time), put him in his jammies (backwards), had to redo that part while he sat there laughing at me like “You really suck at this Auntie V.”  We cuddled for a bit in the old rocking chair (my favorite part).  Then he went right to bed.

Then I opened a bottle of wine and made an appointment with my gynecologist for an IUD.

To read more by V, visit *uncorked.

An enigma: American dating

You are a foreigner.
You come to the US for the first time.
You are single.

So far, so good.

You are excited to land on the Promise Land because frankly who doesn’t want to add a nice Yankee – tall, tanned, lean, muscular, baseball obsessed and hormone-fed – to its list of conquests?!?

Note 1: the list of adjectives works for both sexes. This posting is very theoretical and therefore has to stay as general as possible for scientific purposes.
Note 2: ‘list of conquests’ would totally work in French as well but I would have more likely used  tableau de chasse, hunting board – as if you were collecting your lovers heads as trophies. Like a Black Widow, if you will. Or a mad scientist. A serial dater? Kinda scary stuff, right?
Note 3: please don’t be offended by the use of ‘Yankee’ – it’s meant in a endearing way. ‘Cause I love y’all. I really do.

So once you have recovered from jet-lag, refreshed your pick up skills (and vocab), flossed (a MUST in the US but not really everywhere else, please don’t be grossed out and give us a chance anyway) and sharpened your best weapon (see the soundness of the ‘hunting board’ idea?!?) aka your accent, you go out.

If you are lucky it doesn’t take you toooooooooooooooooo long to meet someone nice, talk, maybe kiss at the end of the night and BAM!!!!!!!

You just entered the dating game.

But you have no clue about it.  Because ‘dating’ as a concept doesn’t exist in your country. It sure doesn’t exist in France. We don’t even have a word for it, much less rules. Dammit.

What are you supposed to do? Just cry loudly and curse Cupid for screwing everything up? Well – if you watched enough movies and/or sitcoms all is not lost to you. You can rack your memory and think about what your favorite character did in the said situation. Or ask around. But don’t expect to be pleased by the responses you’ll get.

As far as I know things in French work in two different ways (at least they did 10 years ago):

  • You just want to get laid, go to a bar/club/_______ and are pretty blatant about it.
  • You are looking for love, romance, sparkles, butterflies and all that, and it might be a little more difficult and time-consuming to get the message across but – still – not impossible.

Of course since you have to start somewhere, you usually go on a first date. A rendez-vous. And of course things are not that different from what a first date in Chicago would be. You laugh, you talk, you try to seduce, you flutter your eyes and touch your hair, maybe brush a foot against a leg.

But usually – and again things might have changed since my old days – you don’t have to worry about the “Are we exclusive?” bit. I mean – what the heck is that?!?!?  Isn’t it difficult enough already? finding someone interested in you, willing to take you out more than a couple times without getting upset if the big ta-da isn’t happening right away – now you have to wonder if you are the only one in the game?!?!?  Is it some sort of fool-proof warranty?  Do you need to go on a test drive before choosing which car you want to ride?

Flash news: it’s ok to dump someone after a couple of days, weeks or months if you don’t like it. Really, it is. You don’t have to keep ‘one’ handy, just in case. It’s just……….wrong.

Come on, dudes!

And what about the ‘label’?!? Why is it so wrong to call him or her your boyfriend/girlfriend? I cannot think of more non-committal than that…except maybe ‘the one I am currently going out with, laughing with, having dinner and stormy sex with but which I just started seeing a week/month ago so we are not engaged yet’. Relax. Save your breath and stay awake from the headache. Boyfriend/girlfriend is just FINE.

But I guess I am either too foreign or too stoopid (and too married) to play the game anyway. Good luck to all the others and let me know if you figure things out. I am all ears.

Reward or responsibility: Why do you do what you do?

We have just instituted a new “chores” policy at our house.  Each of the kids have a set of craft sticks with their chores written on them.  Each day that they complete all their chores, they receive a “golden” stick.  Earn ten sticks and you can either pick out something at the dollar store or have a special time with mom or dad.  Sounds good, right?

My friend takes issue with this policy because she thinks that a chores system should not be rewards-based.  In her view, kids need to learn a sense of responsibility so they should not be rewarded for things that they have a duty to do.

I am torn.  I was listening to the radio and heard an ad to donate blood.  Those who donated would be eligible to win tickets to a local baseball game.  I think it is great to reward people for good behavior or noble actions but have we reached a place where we will only do something if we are rewarded for it?  Are people now unwilling to do something important like donating blood unless there is something in it for them?

I grew up in a household that firmly espoused a strong Protestant work ethic.  If you factor in that we were Dutch Protestants than you know we really learned the value of hard work.  My parents’ parents both emigrated from the Netherlands, arriving here with nothing but a passel of kids.  Both families lived the pull-yourself-up-by-your-own-bootstraps reality.  Needless to say, my sister and I both grew up with the knowledge that hard work can (supposedly) take you anywhere.

Of course I want my children to learn the value of hard work.  I want them to experience the satisfaction of a job well done, without feeling like they need something external in addition.  I also see, however, that as adults, we are rewarded for hard work (usually) by a pay check.  Hard work in college earns you a degree that (hopefully) will help you find gainful employment.  Working to save one’s money means having the freedom to purchase fun “extras” and, eventually, a restful retirement.

Unfortunately, we live in a neighborhood where this scenario doesn’t always play out.  People around here work hard just to barely scrape by.  The needs are great around here and hard work is just plain necessary for survival.  Rewards, if there are any, are rare and sometimes hard to recognize.  Even in my description of adult life above I felt the need to add qualifiers.  The truth is we don’t always receive the “rewards” of our dreams.  If we reward our kids for their work, are we setting them up to believe in a system that may just let them down?

For now, we are sticking with the system.  At this point we have decided that the reward is small enough not to set them up for a life of expectancy.  Through our example and in other areas of life, we will try to promote the values of hard work as its own reward.

Hopefully at some point they will learn that there is not always someone standing by ready to hand out a golden craft stick.

photo by AComment

You can read more from Melanie on her personal site here.

Let us forget restaurants, just for one night…

“Dinner for Schmucks” is apparently the hit comedy this summer.
Surprised?!?
I am.

And a little bit angry.
I just don’t like remakes.
Especially when the original version is just fine, thank-you-very-much, I mean, merci beaucoup.

I didn’t think that Le diner de cons could have made it onto the American big screen. It is an essential French comedy, heavily based on dialogue and play on words, defined by a confined, huis clos like atmosphere much closer to filmed theater than real cinema. Très français.

In Le diner de cons the main event actually never happens. Watch the movie if you want to know why. I promise it is worth it, and yes, you can handle the subtitles. But still – dinner is at the center of things.

And this is what is interesting to me.

Dinner.

More specifically, dinner parties.

They are an endangered species. Dinner as a social activity is almost exclusively taken out, involves restaurant reservations, expensive drinks beforehand, the very limited intimacy of a public dining room, tax, tips and taxi fare.

Why?!?!?

I hosted my last real dinner – the one that involves hours of thinking, browsing, prepping, cooking and a serious dosage of stressing out, cuts and minor burns – last April for a few friends. Cheese soufflé, canard à l’orange with a twist and a velvety red wine sauce, gratin dauphinois, bundles of haricots verts and an Apple tarte tatin. French and elegant.

I had a blast, and everybody chimed in to say that we should definitely do this more often.

Meaning it, I believe.

I don’t know if the general disaffection for hosting dinner parties is an American phenomenon, or if it is a sign of our modern society obsessed with efficiency, time management and immediate satisfaction. In my early twenties, while I was still living in France I would go to friends’ houses on a regular basis for long nights of food, drinks, laughter, games and endless conversations. We were all broke, so we were not going out; restaurants were reserved for special occasions and were usually family affairs. Anyway – the world was ours. We would leave, exhausted and slightly inebriated in the wee morning hours. Sometimes even had breakfast together. I cherish these long-gone moments and fondly remember them as the best times of my life.

So allow me to be a little old-fashioned here. I truly think that we, as a society, could really do with a little more warmth, conviviality and generosity in our lives.

Let’s face it: we all need it.

These last ten years were filled with dinners as well, but of a total different kind. Potlucks and barbeques replaced the elaborate home-cooked meals I was previously used to. You still get together, have fun and a good time but in that new scenario, every single guest get involved in the process. The host is – literally – just hosting and therefore not slaving in the kitchen for hours. Quick, cheap, simple and efficient. In a word – modern.

This is all good and well. However there are few things I love more in life than getting everything ready for my guests. I get up early, make a mental list of the things that need to be done, and get busy. Chopping vegetables, rolling pastry dough, searing meat, reducing sauces and whisking vinaigrettes, whipping, baking, sautéing, tasting. A feast for the senses. The house comes alive.Your pets are begging for scraps and your partner digs his finger in the chocolate coulis, just to make sure. The music is on, you are singing along while checking the clock. The counter top is a mess, just like your face smudged with flour, fruit juice and pearls of sweat. You don’t even have to put on your best Julia Child’s apron and shoot for something fancy. Just make something yourself with your own hands. A lasagna. Your family ragout. Get involved. Be creative. Have fun. Forget just for once to ask your friends to bring dessert. Buy your wine. Leave the barbeque for next week and get behind the stove. Set up a nice table with napkins, a table centerpiece and a bouquet of fresh flowers.

Just give some lovin’.

It is so incredibly rewarding.

From Turtle to Hare: Story of a Race

Once upon a time I was a turtle – well, THE turtle of the story – and didn’t have any problem with it.
And why should I have?!? They may not be very stylish, sure (and that it is a major sin, I am French after all) but they are endangered, people love them, they make cute plush toys and delicious soups.
That you shouldn’t eat. They are endangered, remember?

Except that now I am species-confused.

See, I started running.
And to my (almost) shame, I really like it.

Now you have to know that people – normal, sane, clear-minded people – don’t run in France. Mayyyybe once a year to catch a bus. But really – if you are a gal – you are not very likely to sprint. Like, EVER. Running shoes?!? Whaaaaaa? We feel the deepest sympathy (embedded in many layers of stunned disbelief) for these NYC wonder women who half-jog from home to the subway to work to unsuccessful first dates in their tennis shoes.
Ze poor little zings.

Because we, French women, don’t get fat. Right?
So the benefits of running don’t really occur to us. To take care of our hearts we have red wine, thankyouverymuch. A glass a day keep the doctor and the sneakers away. Besides we have more lovely ways to pamper our feet – ask all the Carrie Bradshaws; high heels and red soles?!? Yeah…

I painfully remember the 3 most excruciating hours of the week back in school. Physical education – it was (so elegantly) called. My own special peeve: athleticism. Or rather: Dragging along, trailing behind, huffing and puffing. I am grateful that there is no video footage of these days – I would probably die on the spot out of embarrassment.
The worst of the worst? 20 minute-run on a track.
A. Nighmare.

I am laughing by myself as I am typing this. Last week I completed a 8 mile run in 1 hour and 20 something minutes. Not a great time, but geeze!!! 1 hour longer than my teenage-years ordeal. 60 long minutes. 3600 seconds.
What happened to me?

Frankly, I am not quite sure. Even when I started working out here in the US (because it’s what you have to do in order to : 1. be cool; 2. fit in your jeans) running was at the bottom of my list. I was making up excuses in order to avoid the treadmill. “It hurts my shins”, “I can’t run since I had strep” – which was partially true. After a bad case of strep and a treatment left unfinished I had developed painful nodules on my legs and almost died of heart failure. I know.

Dramatic pause.

I started training a little more than a year ago. Shyly first. Really not sure of what I was doing. Sounds simple enough, you put one leg in front of the other and you try to walk fast. Really fast. Right? I learned, on the belt, the asphalt, the dirt. I read on the screen and magazines.  I signed up for my first race. 5K with a finish in Wringley Field, the heart of hearts of Chicago. Followed by another one to celebrate Bastille Day. Plans were made for a half-marathon.
I swore though that I would NEVER do a full one. Too demanding.
Damn, I am still French at heart!!!

But a year later I am still running, and enjoying it more than ever. It’s only a beautiful physical challenge – and for me, it’s the best therapy out there. I run and I forget. I get winded and I unwind. I pile up the miles and I get rid of my burdens.
That’s the real treasure, and what keeps me running.

Next stop: September 12. Chicago half-marathon. And a less than 2h30min objective.
I just do it.

Why I support living in community…

We just returned from a week at the beach with my entire family.  My “entire family” consists of myself and my husband, our four kids, my sister and her husband and their baby and my mother and my father.  All eleven of us were crammed into a fairly small cottage on the shores of Lake Michigan.  Thankfully, we had good weather.

Before we left for the trip, I was a little nervous about how the week would go.  After all, we were going to be living in close quarters.  My sister and I have a history of not seeing eye-to-eye (although it has been wonderful to see how mothering has softened us both and brought us closer together).  My dad can get something bordering on “cranky” when the kids get loud and, you guessed it, if the kids are awake, they are loud.

Amazingly, we had a fabulous time with everyone.  Granted, there were moments when tempers flared or the tension rose, but for the most part, everyone got along very well.  What I didn’t expect is that I would leave the week feeling like I had truly had a vacation.  Getting meals together, cleaning up, even keeping the kids happy seemed to be so easy during the week.  I finally realized the key was the fact that everyone pitched in and worked together.

My mom kept complaining that I was doing all the work each night for supper.  I could honestly say, however, that I had only contributed one or two steps to the meal.  With so many hands, the work was truly light.

My sister was having trouble getting her infant son into a good nap routine.  Many times she felt her only recourse was to nurse him to sleep.  Once Aunt Mel, Uncle Bill and Grandma were there to cradle him until he fell asleep, my sister’s burden was infinitely lighter.

Who would deal with the kids during the “witching hour” when everyone’s hungry but supper still needs to get on the table?  Grandpa and Uncle Kirk were there to save the day, keeping everyone occupied until it was time to eat.

Now that I’m home again and having to take care of all this daily business on my own, I realize that the best part of communal living is having plenty of company around throughout the day.  I am an extreme extrovert.  It doesn’t work to cart the kids around to friends’ houses every single day so that I can have some adult conversation.  I spend a lot of the day alone with my thoughts, if I’m not breaking up arguments or trying to keep everyone herded in the same general direction.  The days at home get lonely.  It was nice to have the company during the day.

I’m sure that if we had spent more time together, we would have found more things to argue about and tensions may have risen more frequently.  But if our parents find this country’s financial crisis too overwhelming and ask to move in with us?  I might just say, “yes.”

You can read more from Melanie at her personal site  here.

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