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Outside, inside, whatever

October 21, 2010 By Maureen Lipinski 3 Comments

Last week at preschool drop-off (which has gotten slightly less traumatic, thank the dear LORD), another mom asked me, “Do you work?” Automatically, I replied yes, that I’m a working mom. She asked what it is that I do. I responded with a brief description of my books and let her know that they are, you know, actual books and not just something I photocopied and stashed in the trunk of my car. (It’s at this point that I usually pause and wait for someone to ask me if I know Stephenie Meyer or why I drive a used Ford Explorer instead of a Rolls Royce. I usually let them know that while money does exist in publishing, I could make far more money being a cleaning lady or gas station attendant.)

Yet during my pause, the mom responded with this: “Well, at least you get to be at home with your son.” I nodded and agreed that working from home does have its benefits. It was only until later that I stopped and pondered the meaning behind what she said. Was she saying that at least I wasn’t one of those moms who worked full-time in an office? Because I was one of those moms up until last year. In fact, I would work all day at the office and then come home and work on writing projects, so I had two full-time jobs.

Once I made the transition to working from home, the relief came from simply having one career focus. And while there are definite benefits to working at home, I still occasionally stare longingly at my beautiful suits from J.Crew and remember what it was like to grab Starbucks on my way into the office and know that I had at least eight solid hours to accomplish something, with nary a “Mama?” to be heard.

I spent a few days debating whether or not to ask the mom what she meant, or try and engage her in another conversation about working full-time. Finally, I decided just to let it go. Because it just doesn’t matter. I’m a great mom–one job, two jobs or no jobs. And let’s face it, we all judge each other at times even though we know we shouldn’t. So when this mom’s daughter had a screaming meltdown in the parking lot of school, I just smiled, helped her pick up her backpack and said, “We’ve all been there.”

Visit Maureen’s personal site here.

Filed Under: Humor, Misc

Three years

September 9, 2010 By Maureen Lipinski 2 Comments

Three years ago, a new mom sat on her couch, typing away at a laptop. She could barely keep her eyes open, as her two month old still woke up every two hours to eat. But, now, thankfully, her newborn was fast asleep in his cradle swing, pumped with so much milk, he could’ve floated away to Aruba. She keeps herself plied with cups and cups of chocolate roast coffee. She has to, she’s writing her second book. Her first one hasn’t sold yet, and she won’t admit it, but she still desperately believes in it. Yet, she forges ahead, knowing that the only thing she can control is her own output. She loves her new book and can’t wait to finish it.

Today, a mom with a preschooler sits on her couch, typing on a laptop. Exhausted from chasing her three-year-old around during the day, she’s grateful that her son sleeps for twelve hours at night, and that he’s at preschool for the next two hours. She keeps herself plied with Diet Coke, herbal tea and Dunkin’ Donuts coffee—none of the flavored stuff, thanks—that’s for amateurs. She has to stay alert, she’s writing her fourth book. Her first three sold. Two have been released already and she’s waiting for the cover on the third. She’s not sure yet if she’ll be able to continue writing full-time for the near future. Yet, she forges ahead, knowing that the only thing she can control is her own words. She loves her new book and can’t wait to finish it.

From then to now, autumn is still alternately hot and humid and cold and rainy; the leaves still change. My son still makes me want to inject coffee directly into my veins, but he also makes me laugh at the most unexpected moments. Book publishing is still a scary world, plagued with much uncertainty.

But most importantly, what hasn’t changed is my will to write books, and my knowledge that I was meant to do this.

So I sit here, in front of my laptop and push out words. And every now and then, I swear I can still smell chocolate roast coffee.

Visit Maureen’s personal site here.

Filed Under: Biz, Entertainment, Motivate, Nostalgia, Parenting

Second verse, same as the first?

August 7, 2010 By Maureen Lipinski 2 Comments

I’m five months pregnant with my second child. Way back in the spring, when the pregnancy test showed two lines, I thought I had a pretty good idea of how the next few months would go. I envisioned months of glorious eating, breezing through that first trimester with nothing more than a slight wave, and donning maternity clothes around six weeks. In short, exactly the same pregnancy that I had with my son.

Well.

I’m five months pregnant now, and food is only just starting to seem attractive. I hated every minute of the first trimester, with its horrid hangover-like symptoms.  For days on end, I’d lay on the couch and moan as an endless stream of Barney/Jack’s Big Music Show/Yo Gabba Gabba/Sesame Street played on the television and occasionally offer crackers to my two-year-old.

I loved being pregnant the first time around. This time? Not so much. Of course, I’m sure it has a lot to do with the fact that I spend my days wrestling Sharpies out of my son’s hands and hauling him out of Target, Trader Joe’s, and the park during meltdowns. All of that kicking and screaming leaves very little time for me to dwell on the precious life form growing inside me.

It also doesn’t help that I know the path ahead. Instead of imagining a slumbering newborn sighing peacefully next to me in the middle of the night, I picture reality: staring zombie-like at an infomercial while my newborn wants to party all night long. And then wrestling Sharpies from my son the next morning.

But having done this once before, I also know to expect the good stuff. The first laugh, the first smile, the glorious six-month-old baby chunk. The fact that I will have a child who will remain stationary when I leave the room.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to scrub Sharpie out of our couch.

Filed Under: Humor

Summer vacations: Toddler edition

July 30, 2010 By Maureen Lipinski 4 Comments

Growing up, family vacations meant time spent in the car with my annoying siblings, reading a book per day and long afternoons filled with sand, surf and popsicles. Even though a trip often meant dealing with hassles like the occasional cancelled flight or misplaced suitcase, it was glorious and certainly the highlight of my summer.

This continued into my twenties, and came to a screeching halt when I had my son. Now, vacations take an Air Force One level of preparation and more planning than my wedding reception.

I used to think morning flights were exciting—the idea of getting up in the middle of the night to start my trip seemed so thrilling. Now, I picture hauling my son out of bed, getting pelted in the head with a sippy cup, and dealing with the inevitable nothing-is-open-yet-at-the-airport-yet-my-child-is-screaming-for-fries.

And let’s not even talk about the stress of taking a two year old on an airplane—for us and our fellow tortured passengers.

To think I used to declare that I’d never be one of those people who changed when I had kids. Lo, I shall now laugh heartily.

But it isn’t all terrible. I get to see all my favorite vacation spots through my son’s eyes. Suddenly, all the shells on the beach aren’t just annoying land mines on the way to finding a perfect sunning spot. They become blocks to stack, decorations for a sand castle and precious treasures. And, of course, weapons to pelt at my head.

So this weekend, I shall don my toddler-proof helmet and head into the car for our week-long family vacation to the Northwoods of Wisconsin. I can only pray that the sippy cup doesn’t get eaten by a bear.

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Filed Under: Humor, Parenting